Dont kick the chair!

everyone would undergo some hard situations..everyone.

but your heart has to be strong..

jangan marah-marah. because it will get better

IT CAN ONLY GET BETTER <3

sabar~ orang-orang yang sabar pasti ada ganjarannya :)

The Broken ones

the broken part of someone that builds the personality.

that broken part is the flaws that make a person beautiful.

be stronger, better person, strengthen the heart <3

because you are not alone.

saya bukan orang yang senang.

kita susah sama-sama... help each other. dan senang sama-sama :)

The only exception

you are the only exception~ and im on my way to believing..

i cant say i will love more than anyone else. bcos i dont know people's heart. they might love more than i could. but what do i know is that... i love all of me.. bcos i dont have the urge to compare myself with anyone else. its me and you.

the tension of opposites

i read a book. written by Mitch Albom. have a lot of things to ponder. i cried.

there is something that written in the book that i cant forget.

so here it goes:

"Have i told you about the tension of opposites?" he says.


The tension of opposites?

"Life is a series of pulls back and forth. you want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else. something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn't. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted.

"A tension of opposites, like a pull on rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle."

Sounds like a wrestling match, I say.

" A wrestling match." He laughs. '"Yes, you could describe life that way."

so which side wins, I ask?

"Which side wins?"

He smiles at me, the crinkled eyes, the crooked teeth,

"LOVE WINS. LOVE ALWAYS WINS"

Dumbfounded, i read.. i realised. love do wins. love what makes us strive for something in this world. how we are living in this world. we know our goals. Love is powerful.

love for Allah and the Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. we strive to follow the rules and living in this world with purpose.

love for family, we strive to become a better person to help our family.

love for animals and earth, we strive to help them.

love for ourselves. we strive to be a better person

its because of love. that leads our action to do something.

our love for fame, love for money. that may lead us to do something bad.. because we love them. if we hate them we are not going to do it.

love for someone, makes us do something, and might think nights and days and search for jobs just to marry someone.

its because of love.. love does wins and love always wins.

i never see how important love is. i cried.

i never let my guard down for love. i have no problem in giving it. but the problem in receive it.

when people try to give their love, i might runaway, because im afraid to receive it, because i dont know how. and i just cant. im afraid to break their hearts and my heart.

ive seen so much heart breaking because of love among my love ones.. thus, i build the wall so high. im afraid, ill be going under the same condition. its heart breaking to see them suffer.

but why i see the negative, while its powerful and full of positive.

this makes me ponder..

-so should i? i dont know~

i need enough strength and believe.

and let the heart and time decide.

SILENCE

im an awkward person. yes i am. im being awkward all the time.

i cant stand the silence when people not talking, i feel so awkward.. the moment of silence is awkward.

i dont say much when im new with people. i just dont know how to initiate a conversation.

people might say "sombong la dia" but actually i just dont know what to say. and im afraid if i initiate conversation, it might make people not comfortable. so i let people to initiate conversation first, which shows that they are comfortable enough to talk with me. and im ready to hear and listen.

so to avoid, people call me sombong and the awkward silence, i will try my best to talk about anything. even actually, im not comfortable doing it. (unless, i really want to converse, and pour my heart out or opinions.) i might say things that is so embarrassing sometimes, i even get angry (dont know why,maybe i frustrated with myself bcos i cant talk)

but then i realised..

why are we embarrassed by silence? what comfort do we find in all the noise?

we shouldnt.. we should comfortable with ourselves right?

so be you.. and the right people will come. and having the best conversation ever. maybe with deep talk about life, any heavy topics or even laugh out loud without reasons also the precious moment of silence.

LOVEMON

whenever i am done doing something
i will look at surrounding.
finding and searching for people.
but

no one would be there.
NO ONE
i know~
i know thats gonna happen
and always does.

no one to be blamed,
because i know
no one would have the patient of the whole world to wait
its my fault for ignoring
pursuing only my goals.

people need to move on,
they progressing,
so i dont expect for them to wait
who am i to get depressed just because people dont wait for me
am i that special?
no

im ordinary person.
so they dont wait.

BUT...
whenever i done doing something,
take a look around..
there will be only one
ONLY ONE,
always wait for me.

MY CAT, LEMON.

he will always be there
always~

no matter how ugly i am
no matter how bad i am
no matter how stupid i am
he always be there and love me the same.

thank you lemon, so much!

i really appreciate everything you do as a loyal cat.
THANK YOU :')

i would cry in my heart thinking you getting old
lay next to me as always
i know the time for forever goodbye will come one day
i know that.

it will be the most heart breaking

but for my most loyal companion i ever had
i will make the most of the moment im in now.

you might not pretty as other cat
your fur is not shining like other people's cat
your tail is short and and straight,
but, you are the most beautiful cat i ever seen.
and always will be.

you are my cat, and im your friend.

THANK YOU LEMON.
 really~ thank you. :')

lots of love <3

meet AIFA

 so there is a lady name aifa...

she is my best friend, ex roommate, house mate, even bedmate. lol.

you dont know how hard it is to draw these.

met her, last thursday.

AIPA

she is still the same amazing the way she is.

she is the one, that i can get weird with ( comfortably being myself) and have a deep and serious talk. (without any judgments)
she respect everyone and trying hard to please everyone.

to me everyone has flaws. but the most important is how the good sides overcome and shadow the flaws.

i believe, it is hard to describe a person through writings, because you have to know a person, friend with them. then you will know how awesome she is.

we even jokes that we would marry each other, if any of us happened to be a guy... but.. NO. haha

if i ever find a guy like her. i would drop everything! (well... i mean not everything~~i mean i would drop things in my hand if i ever hold anything) and pulls out a knife ( must be kiwi brand. must be) and threatens ask him to marry me! yesss... hahah hopefully not going to jail. *and why i even bring knife with me

this is the in famous kiwi brand knife.

im known for poker face, heartless, feelingless... but to be truthful im still a human though not a robot.

i am just an excellent pretender. haha. despite that, she knows me. she said that... if someone wants to get to know you, they have to know to read your eyes.. because your eyes show everything.. yes you are smiling right now but, your eyes.. they dont show it. are you sad? *dumbfounded yes that time, im quite sad. i dont remember why...

she has sense... hahaha : p

back in kuantan in 2011,18yo

found this picture! haha gila innocent

thank you for drew me, a tall-but-with-short-legs-purplish-and-assymetrical-body-propotion boyfriend

why he has only one toe~? ill bet he would easily fall while walking.

whatever it is...

AIFA the awesome lady!!!